Chung laughing at a music festival we went to in 2013
You may or may not be aware that Chung is half Korean. When we met, she was an established teacher in the U.S. I had already been teaching in Korea for one year. To reconnect with her foreign relatives and explore her culture, she decided to join me on my journey abroad.
Chung is beautiful. There is no doubt about it. She’s got a great smile, beautiful skin and a unique androgynous aesthetic. That coupled with her years of teaching experience and modest Korean skills, we both assumed her transition into Korean work culture would be simple. It hasn’t been.
Coming from my background as a cis-white female, I have never experienced racism from Koreans. My sister, after traveling through Asia, claimed that Koreans were the nicest people she had encountered.
However, facing everyday with my partner, the underbelly of Korean culture has been exposed. At her school, students openly discuss her gender with each other. Is she a boy or a girl? Her co-teacher has commented on her appearance directly to her, wondering if her issues with her mother stem from her appearance as a boy. A lunch lady has refused to serve meat to her, even though the price of this lunch is automatically deducted from her salary. While walking through Hongdae, a group of young adults followed her, laughing to themselves while wondering aloud if she was a boy or a girl. Her grandfather has commented on the “ugliness” of her darker complexion. It goes on and on.
Chung being a babe at Platoon in Gangnam
It’s heartbreaking. What’s worse is that it is coloring Chung’s own self-identity. Eager to study Korean when she first moved here, she now refuses to study it. The main reason why? She doesn’t want to have intimate contact with a Korean person who will ultimately judge her based on her appearance.
If you are reading this and wondering if Chung is simply being sensitive or has just met the wrong people or that she might be too negative and shouldn’t let other people’s opinions truly affect her… then I will assume you have not felt the effects of discrimination yourself.
If you are reading this and have felt sympathy or understanding, please feel free to share your advice or own experiences below.
Kitten Ghost 
At the risk of making a sweeping generalization, I would say it’s more likely the exact opposite of this sentiment: “My sister, after traveling through Asia, claimed that Koreans were the nicest people she had encountered.”
I hope both of you will get to meet nicer, more genuine and sincere people in Korea soon.
I’ve worked with some Koreans who I would consider open-minded. But I wonder what would happen if their tolerant points of view were challenged… how would they act then? Unfortunately, I must say that I am pretty skeptical of all Korean people at the moment. I really hope this will change in the future.
There is a grain (or more) of truth to your musing. More often than not, I feel their understanding of open-mindedness to be narrow and shallow. Contrary to their claims, at times, their speech and actions leak disrespect and insensitivity to minorities in areas that they don’t seem to understand (e.g., religion, dietary preferences). It’s a challenge but there’s probably some few good people out there. Don’t give up.
It’s comforting to know that others understand what I’m feeling. What’s your personal experience in Korea? I see from your blog that you’re living here, are you teaching?
I’m vegetarian and non-white (there’s a big difference here, whether you’re white or not). So what I’ve shared is really stemming from my own encounters. I’ve had someone I know (so not a weird stranger) laugh when I said I’m vegetarian (even though it’s not a new fact to her), and “sing” to a tune the word “why”. I was in such utter shock I had no response – clearly because such a reaction was not just unexpected, it’s so ludicrous and unbelievable, I couldn’t believe my eyes and ears that it was really happening.